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Hi, my name is Rachel and I’m just like every other girl my age, except for one thing…and well, that’s what I want to talk to you about today. I’m 16 years old, and OK…I don’t really know how to put this…I’m ugly! Not like hideously ugly, but I’m no beauty queen. My mom’s a beauty queen though, well at least she was when she was younger. She was the beauty queen of our state, but now she just helps run the beauty pageant. And she looks wonderful for her age. She’s super slim and has long straight hair. Ever since I was a little girl she’s always tried to make me look prettier. She used to buy me expensive pink frilly dresses and tie my frizzy hair up in cute polka-dot hair bows, but she still never seemed satisfied. She never registered me into the cutest baby competitions and never ever let me participate in any of her beauty pageants. I mean it’s not as if I even want to take part, but she’s my mom and she runs it, she could at least ask me if I want to join, right? Or at least invite me to attend!
For my thirteenth birthday, she bought me a make-up set and said I should start wearing make-up every day if I ever want to have a chance at being successful! Can you believe it? A few of the girls in my year at school are participating in the upcoming pageant, and their moms are there at every rehearsal cheering them on. My mom’s there too, of course, seeing as she’s in charge of it.
One day, my friend Marissa asked me to come over to her place after school. As we walked out of the school gates, her mom came running over to us telling her she’d be late for the special beauty pageant ceremony. She’d completely forgotten it was today! I told her I’d just see her at school tomorrow, but her mom insisted I come along too. I knew my mom was the guest speaker at this ceremony, and I’d offered to come along and support her, but she went really quiet when I said that, and told me I should probably just stay at home and do my homework. I didn’t argue with her because she really didn’t seem to want me to come.
I got in the car with Marissa and her mom and decided that maybe my mom was being modest and would secretly love me to be there. As we arrived at the venue, Marissa headed backstage to join the other beauty queen contestants, and I took a seat in the front row with Marissa’s mom. Before my mom was due to go on stage, she came out to check that everything was in order, and that’s when she spotted me. I waved and smiled at her, but she didn’t wave back. She looked upset with me. She asked me what I was doing here and why I wasn’t at home? She told me to go wait in the car or I’d be in big trouble. I didn’t even reply to her. It didn’t seem worth the fight. I grabbed my bag and said bye to Marissa’s mom before running off. Marissa’s mom looked at me with tears in her eyes.
An hour later my mom climbed into the car and we drove home in silence. I went straight to my room and locked the door. I just felt so alone. My mom came to my room and I opened my door because I thought maybe she wanted to apologise, but instead, she said she’d booked me an appointment with Dr. Reynolds to see if he could fix my face, and with Dr. Smith to discuss my diet. Again, I didn’t even argue. I’d just given up. It had been like this my whole life. The next day we were sat in Dr. Reynolds office and he looked at me in confusion. He asked my mom why on earth we were here. He looked at me and said I have one of the most beautiful faces he has ever seen and that there’s nothing that needs alterations on my face! My mom interrupted him and said she thinks I am ugly and that it’s affecting my school life and my social life. When I heard her words I ran out of Dr. Reynolds office and burst into tears. Why was my mom so cruel? Why couldn’t I have a mom like Marrisa’s?